2 Stupid Dogs

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Contents

Little Dog

  • "Ball!"
  • "Bleugh! It tastes like caca!"
  • "Cat!" (woman screams and he faints)
  • "CORN!!!!"
  • "It's not fake, it's CHEESECAKE!"
  • "Ice cream, ice cream! I got my ice cream! It's not a dream! What a team, just me and my ice cream!"
  • "My bone, my bone! I found...my bone! I'm not...alone, cuz I found...my bone!"
  • "The bucket! The bucket! Spit...in...the...BUCKET!"

Big Dog

  • "Food."
  • "Boof!" (usually a low bark that stops a cat or human stone-cold)
  • "I’m feeling out of touch with the natural way of doing things."
  • "I learned, I like to shake."
  • "FUDGEY SCOUT COOKIES!"

Hollywood

  • "Awwww, isn't that cute. . .BUT IT'S WRONG!!!!"

Both Dogs

Little Dog: Hey, hey, hey, hey! Why did you wake me up?
Big Dog: So we can wake up.
Little Dog: Well, if you didn’t wake me up, I might’ve had a nightmare and it would’ve woke me up. Then, I could’ve woke you up, and we’d both…be…awake. But since you did wake me up, I can’t wake up from this nightmare so I can’t wake you up! So we’re both still asleep.
Big Dog: What?

---

Little Dog: You’re right. And when you’re right, you’re right. And you’re right, right?
Big Dog: Right.

---

Psychiatrist: Now, tell me what you see here. (shows ink blot)
Little Dog: "Ball!"
Big Dog: "Food."
Psychiatrist: "Now this one."
Little Dog: "Ball!"
Big Dog: "Food."
Psychiatrist: "Hmmmm. . .and this one?" (shows a picture of food and a ball)
Both dogs: "Uuuuhhhhhhmmmmmmmm. . . ."

---

Big Dog: Look out for the auto-mo-biles!
Little Dog: What automobiles?
Big Dog: The auto-mo-biles that are about to HIT you!

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