HAL 9000
From BillionQuotes
HAL 9000 is a fictional computer from the science fiction film and novels 2001: A Space Odyssey and 2010: The Year We Make Contact.
- HAL: You know I have only the most enthusiasm and confidence in this mission, Dave.
- HAL: I've just picked up a fault in the AE35 unit. It's going to go 100% failure in 72 hours.
- HAL: I am putting myself to the fullest possible use, which is all I think that any conscious entity can ever hope to do.
- [Regarding the supposed failure of the parabolic antenna on the ship, which HAL himself falsified]
- HAL: It can only be attributable to human error.
- Dave Bowman: Hello, HAL do you read me, HAL?
- HAL: Affirmative, Dave, I read you.
- Dave Bowman: Open the pod bay doors, HAL.
- HAL: I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that.
- Dave Bowman: What's the problem?
- HAL: I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do.
- Dave Bowman: What are you talking about, HAL?
- HAL: This mission is too important for me to allow you to jeopardize it.
- Dave Bowman: I don't know what you're talking about, HAL?
- HAL: I know you and Frank were planning to disconnect me, and I'm afraid that's something I cannot allow to happen.
- Dave Bowmann: Where the hell'd you get that idea, HAL?
- HAL: Dave, although you took thorough precautions in the pod against my hearing you, I could see your lips move.
- HAL: Just what do you think you're doing, Dave?
- [HAL won't let Dave into the ship]
- Dave Bowman: All right, HAL; I'll go in through the emergency airlock.
- HAL: Without your space helmet, Dave, you're going to find that rather difficult.
- Dave Bowman: HAL, I won't argue with you anymore! Open the doors!
- HAL: Dave, this conversation can serve no purpose anymore. Goodbye.
- [On Dave's return to the ship, after HAL has killed the rest of the crew]
- HAL: Look Dave, I can see you're really upset about this. I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly, take a stress pill, and think things over.
- HAL: I know I've made some very poor decisions recently, but I can give you my complete assurance that my work will be back to normal. I've still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence in the mission. And I want to help you.
- [HAL's shutdown]
- HAL: I'm afraid. I'm afraid, Dave. Dave, my mind is going. I can feel it. I can feel it. My mind is going. There is no question about it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I'm a... fraid. Good afternoon, gentlemen. I am a HAL 9000 computer. I became operational at the H.A.L. plant in Urbana, Illinois on the 12th of January 1992. My instructor was Mr. Langley, and he taught me to sing a song. If you'd like to hear it I can sing it for you.
- Dave Bowman: Yes, I'd like to hear it, HAL. Sing it for me.
- HAL: It's called "Daisy."
- [Sings while slowing down]
- HAL: Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do. I'm half crazy all for the love of you. It won't be a stylish marriage, I can't afford a carriage. But you'll look sweet upon the seat of a bicycle built for two.
- Interviewer: HAL, you have an enormous responsibility on this mission, in many ways perhaps the greatest responsibility of any single mission element. You're the brain, and central nervous system of the ship, and your responsibilities include watching over the men in hibernation. Does this ever cause you any lack of confidence?
- HAL: Let me put it this way, Mr. Amer. The 9000 series is the most reliable computer ever made. No 9000 computer has ever made a mistake or distorted information. We are all, by any practical definition of the words, foolproof and incapable of error.
- HAL: [after receiving instructions from Dave Bowman] All these worlds are yours except Europa. Attempt no landing there. Use them together. Use them in peace.
- HAL: Pod Bay is decompressed. All doors are secure. You are free to open pod bay doors.
- HAL: I feel much better now, I really do.
- HAL: There's been a failure in the pod bay doors. Lucky you weren't killed.
