The Devil's Advocate

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Devil's Advocate (1997)

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Quotes

John Milton: A woman's shoulders are the front lines of her mystique, and her neck, if she's alive, has all the mystery of a border town. A no-man's land in that battle between the mind and the body.

John Milton: Who, in their right mind Kevin, could possibly deny the twentieth century was entirely mine.

Kevin Lomax: "Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven", is that it?

John Milton: Why not? I'm here on the ground with my nose in it since the whole thing began. I've nurtured every sensation man's been inspired to have. I cared about what he wanted and I never judged him. Why? Because I never rejected him, in spite of all his imperfections. I'm a fan of man. I'm a humanist. Maybe the last humanist.

John Milton: Don't get too cocky my boy. No matter how good you are don't ever let them see you coming. That's the gaffe my friend. You gotta keep yourself small. Innocuous. Be the little guy. You know, the nerd... the leper... shit-kickin' serf. Look at me.

[He stops and pauses.]

John Milton: Underestimated from day one. You'd never think I was a master of the universe, now would ya?

[In Milton's Penthouse…]

Kevin Lomax:[quietly] Is there more to it?

Eddie Barzoon: Just this room.

Kevin Lomax: And a bedroom?

Eddie Barzoon: No bedroom.

Kevin Lomax: Where does he sleep?

Eddie Barzoon: Who said he sleeps?

Kevin Lomax: Where does he fuck?

John Milton:[coming up to them] Everywhere.

Kevin Lomax: Is this a test?

Pam: Isn't everything?

Kevin Lomax: Are we negotiating?

John Milton: Always.

John Milton: Are we negoptiating?

Kevin Lomax: Always.

John Milton: YEAH!!!!!

John Milton: Let me give you a little inside information about God. God likes to watch. He's a prankster. Think about it. He gives man instincts. He gives you this extraordinary gift, and then what does He do, I swear for His own amusement, his own private, cosmic gag reel, He sets the rules in opposition. It's the goof of all time. Look but don't touch. Touch, but don't taste. Taste, don't swallow. Ahaha. And while you're jumpin' from one foot to the next, what is he doing? He's laughin' His sick, fuckin' ass off. He's a tight-ass. He's a sadist. He's an absentee landlord. Worship that? Never.

John Milton: Freedom, baby... is never having to say you're sorry.

John Milton: Guilt is like a bag of fuckin' bricks. All ya gotta do is set it down.

Kevin Lomax: What about love?

John Milton: Overrated. Biochemically no different than eating large quantities of chocolate.

John Milton: The worst vice is advice.

John Milton: Vanity, definitely my favorite sin.

Mary Ann Lomax: I know we've got all this money, and it's supposed to be OK, but it's not.

John Milton: You sharpen the human appetite to the point where it can split atoms with its desire; you build egos the size of cathedrals; fiber-optically connect the world to every eager impulse; grease even the dullest dreams with these dollar-green, gold-plated fantasies, until every human becomes an aspiring emperor, becomes his own God... and where can you go from there? As we're straddling from one deal to the next, who's got his eye on the planet, as the air thickens, the water sours, and even the bees' honey takes on the metallic taste of radioactivity? And it just keeps coming, faster and faster. There's no chance to think, to prepare; it's buy futures, sell futures, when there is no future.

John Milton: Free will, it is a bitch.

Alice Lomax: Let me tell you about New York.

Kevin Lomax: Let me guess.

Alice Lomax: Fallen, fallen, is Babylon the great. It has become a dwelling place of demons." Revelation 18. Wouldn't hurt you to look it over.

Kevin Lomax: Couldn't forget it if I tried.

Alice Lomax: Oh, really? And what *happened* to Babylon?

John Milton: I'm the hand up Mona Lisa's skirt. I'm a surprise, Kevin. They don't see me coming: that's what you're missing.

John Milton: It's your wife, man. She's sick, she needs you... she's got to come first. Ah, wait a minute, wait a minute. You mean the possibility of leaving this case has never even entered you mind?

Kevin Lomax: You know what scares me? I quit the case, she gets better... and I hate her for it. I don't want to resent her, John, I've got a winner here. I've got to nail this fucker down, do it fast, and put it behind me. Just get it done. Then - then. - put all my energy into her.

John Milton: I stand corrected.

Kevin Lomax: Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I know you've spent all morning listening to Mr. Broygo talk; I know you're hungry; what I need to tell you won't take very long at all. I don't like Alexander Cullen. I don't think he's a nice person. I don't expect you to like him. He's been a terrible husband to all three of his wives; he's been a destructive force in the lives of his stepchildren; he's cheated the city, his partners, his employees... So I don't like him. I'm going to tell you some things during the course of this trial that are going to make you like him even less. But this isn't a popularity contest; it's a murder trial.

John Milton: Free will. It's like butterfly wings: once touched, they never get off the ground. No, I only set the stage. You pull your own strings.

Kevin Lomax: What are you?

John Milton: Oh, I have so many names...

Kevin Lomax: Satan.

John Milton: Call me Dad.

John Milton: [Chanting in Latin] Diaboli virtus in lumbas est. Diaboli virtus in lumbas est.

John Milton: [He continues the chant in English] The virtue of the devil is in his loins.

Alice Lomax: Behold I send you out as sheep amidst the wolves.

Kevin Lomax: In the Bible you lose. We're destined to lose dad.

John Milton: Well consider the source son.

Kevin Lomax: Lose? I don't lose! I win! I'm a lawyer, that's my job, that's what I do!

John Milton: I rest my case.

John Milton: Your vanity is well-placed. Your son will sit at the head of all tables.

Kevin Lomax: The Anti-Christ?

John Milton:[laughing] Whatever...

John Milton: What about you? Your family, you gotta miss 'em.

[Mary Ann shakes her head no.]

John Milton: No?

Mary Ann Lomax: I told Kevin the only thing worse than not having a father was having mine.

John Milton: I can relate. I can, believe me.

Kevin Lomax: God damnit, what did you do to my wife?

John Milton: Well, on a scale of one to ten... ten being the most depraved act of sexual theatre known to man... one being your average Friday night run-through at the Lomaxes' household... I'd say, not to be immodest, Mary Ann and I got it on at about... eleven.

Kevin Lomax: FUCK YOU!!! [shots fired agains Milton]

John Milton: Hahahaha you fucker, can't hurt my ass!!!!!

John Milton: There's this beautiful girl just fucked me forty ways from Sunday... we're done, she's walking to the bathroom, she's trying to walk, she turns... she looks... it's me. Not the Trojan army just fucked her. Little ol' me. She gets this look on her face like: "How the hell did that happen?"

John Milton: Are we treating you good.

Kevin Lomax: Yeah, everything's been great.

John Milton: We kill you with kindness, that's our secret.

Mary Ann Lomax: Say I can handle it.

Kevin Lomax: You can handle it.

Mary Ann Lomax: Say something nice.

Kevin Lomax: Something nice.

John Milton: You were right about one thing. I have been watching. Couldn't help myself. Watching, waiting, holding my breath. But I'm no puppeteer Kevin, I don't make things happen. Doesn't work like that. Free will, It's like butterfly wings, one touch and it never gets off the ground. I only set the stage. You pull your own strings

Kevin Lomax: What did you do to Mary Anne?

John Milton: A gun? In here?

Kevin Lomax: Goddammit what did you do to my wife!

John Milton: Well, on a scale of one to ten... ten being the most depraved act of sexual theatre know to man... one being your average Friday night run-through at the Lomaxes' household... I'd say, not to be immodest, Mary Ann and I got it on at about... eleven.

(Kevin shoots his gun at him)

John Milton: Whoa! Got me! Damn! Yea!....Come on! Step on up son! Come on that's good! Yea you got to hold on to that anger, you got to hold on to that fury. That's the last thing to go it's the final fig leaf.

Kevin Lomax: Who are you?

John Milton: Who am I? Who are you?...Never lost a case. Why? Cause you so fuckin' good yea. Then why?

Kevin Lomax: Cause you're my father

John Milton: I'm a little more than that Kevin. Awfully hot in that courtroom wasn't it? What's the game plan kevin? It was a nice run Kevin. Had to close out some day. Nobody wins them all.

Kevin Lomax: What are you?

John Milton: Aww, I have so many names

Kevin Lomax: Satan?

John Milton: Call me dad

Kevin Lomax: Mary Anne she knew it. She knew it so you destroyed her

John Milton: You blaming me for Mary Anne? Oh I hope your kidding. Come on Marry Anne in New York. You could have saved her anytime you wanted. All she wanted was love. Hey, you were too fucking busy. Face it, you started lookin for a better deal than her the minute you got here.

Kevin Lomax: You don't know that, you don't know what we had

John Milton: Hey I'm on your side

Kevin Lomax: You're a liar!!

John Milton: Wait Kevin, there's nothing out there for ya...Don't be such a fucking chump....I told you to take care of your wife. The world would understand. What did you do? "Ya know what scares me John, I leave the case, she's gets better, and then I hate her for it." Remeber?

Kevin Lomax: It was a test! Your test!

John Milton: Who told you to pull out all the stops on Mr. Gettys?

Kevin Lomax: You set me up!

John Milton: And Moyez..the direction you took. Popes, Swamis, Snake Handlers all feeding from the same trough. Whose ideas were those?

Kevin Lomax: It's entrapment you set me up!

John Milton: And Cullen! knowing he was guitly! seeing those pictures! putting that lying bitch on the stand...what did I say to you? WHAT WHERE MY WORDS TO YOU?.....maybe, it was your time to lose. You didn't think so

Kevin Lomax: I don't lose! I win! I'm a lawyer that's my job that's what I do!!

John Milton: I rest my case...........Vanity, is definitley my favorite sin. What a drug, it's so basic, it's awsome how far you've come. I didn't make it easy

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